And yet, I still vote more often than I play the slots.
Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category
I think they meant to put this sign by the white wine (my liquid courage of choice).
You’d never know it, but I took these on a nice day with my Crapberry.
You know which one I mean.
I think I have found the single worst thing on earth to do when you have a stomach ache: Rinse out a jar of mayonnaise. It’s not hard to guess how I found this out. It was so gross it actually made me laugh and I felt better for a few seconds.
Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus by John Gray
My rating: 1 of 5 stars
I asked my mom to send me this book because I thought it might be a fun, albeit antiquated, way to shed some light on how men and women communicate. Kind of like How to Win Friends and Influence People for relationships.
From the beginning, the author addresses that not all men and women are the same. He even calls special attention to women in the workforce who tend to assume more masculine communication tactics. Then he launches into the worst kind of stereotyping of men and women I’ve ever read in my life.
Because of this book, I am now mad at the early 90s. Seriously, early 90s, don’t even talk to me. There’s nothing you can say to undo this.
Men Are from Mars was a best seller. A BEST SELLER! For six years! Mid 90s, I’m glaring at you, too.
Anyway, the book makes women sound like whiny nincompoops and men sound like closed jerkoffs. I stopped reading after 50 pages or so.
At Quinn’s. Eating plates of meat.
A young girl at a parade I was in told me I look like Katy Perry. I wanted to take it as a compliment, but all I know about her is that she’s a dark-haired pop star. So I smiled and nodded instead of saying thank you, and then I went home and looked her up.
Blech. But her song did inspire me to write this little ditty:
Emerald City girls, we’re quite destestable
Ironic shades, band t-shirts on top
Pale white skin, so cold we’ll freeze your icicle
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Emerald City girls, we’re so deniable
Dark, mean, weird, we’ll break off your cock
West coast represent, now put your hands up
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
When I was little, I used to say I wanted to be a mermaid when I grew up.
Now… not so much. Turns out I’ll be much more useful as a landlubber at a water treatment company.