Monday, February 12, 2007
What Happened THIS Time?
It's been almost two months since I've posted anything, not because nothing happened, and not even because too much was happening. My intentions were good, just go on believing that. Anyway, in no particular order, here are some cool things that I've been meaning to describe in great detail with pictures and the whole nine yards.
The Master Cleanse Diet
For 10 whole days, Gus and I consumed nothing but tea made of lemons, maple syrup, and cayenne pepper, as directed by the The Master Cleanse Diet. (There are many other sites about this diet. As with most niche activity sites, most aren't easy on the eyes, but this one pretty much sums it up.)
I thought it was a strange way to detox, but I read more about it and discovered that several people I know have successfully done it. I decided to give it a try, to lose weight and feel more energetic of course, and also to see if I could do it. Gus once again proved his awesomeness by doing it with me, which I really appreciate since we spend so much of our free time together.
The secret to this diet is keeping busy. I usually eat when I'm bored, so I just had to make sure I stayed active. The first couple of days were pretty easy. I never felt hungry, but after awhile I started to really miss ice cream and Indian food. I'm glad I had a few experienced people to talk to when I started to feel apprehensive. In the grand scheme of things, 10 days is not a long time to go without solid food. In fact, I would have gone without solid food for another 10 days if it guaranteed that I wouldn't have to field any more questions about how I can function without protein.
Santacon
This is probably the coolest thing Gus and I have ever done. A thousand New Yorkers woke up one brisk Saturday morning, dressed up like Santa Claus, and met on Delancey Street to begin what would become a wonderfully glaring spectacle. As it turns out, Santacon is an international event. I wish someone had told me earlier, but at the same time, I'm glad my first event was the New York City Santacon because it probably drew the largest crowd.
The first bar was so full, we didn't even try to get in. Then we took a subway to Bryant Park. The tunnel was full of Santas, except for one street musician playing free-standing flutes and a guitar. The only Christmas song he knew was "Feliz Navidad" so he kept playing it over and over for all the dancing Santas waiting for the train. Most of the passengers on the train were bewildered but somewhat entertained. Most Santas were pretty courteous throughout the day, making sure regular people could easily get on and off the train. When we got off the train, I passed out piñata toys and let kids tell me what they wanted for Christmas.
We later went to a centrally located bar and danced to eighties music. When we proceeded to Central Park a little later, the pack had gotten pretty big. Santas convened on the grassy areas, rode the carousel, and hung from the playground equipment. My friend and I played on the swings for awhile and laughed at the Santas who had passed out on the lawn. Some people brought a bunch of Twister mats, so a lot of Santas were doing that too.
Once it got dark, everyone went to some other bar, but a group of us when to the Crocodile Lounge for drinks and free pizza. At some point, you need to sit down without a zillion people in your midst, even if they are all dressed like Santa Claus.
We met up with most of the Santas at the crowded Pussycat Lounge, where I stared at boobs and had my drink order ignored until someone told me to come upstairs. There, I enjoyed an attentive bartender, comfortable couches, and a burlesque show. Gus had gone to the Rainer Maria show for a few hours and met up with us just as the burlesque show ended.
I think most of the Santas had disbanded at this point. Maybe not, I don't know. But our group went to The Patriot, which apparently, on Saturdays, is like a sad Coyote Ugly. One of the girls badgered me to get on the bar and dance and kept asking me for a kitty. I still wasn't drunk enough for that kind of action.
But alls well that ends well. When Gus and I got home, we re-enacted that one scene from the movie, Bad Santa. Heh heh, you know the one...
The rest of my photos from Santacon
Bruno's photos from Santacon
Someone else's photos from Santacon
Aruba
The price was right, so we decided to take a short Christmas vacation in Aruba. The warm weather felt especially good, but other than that, it's almost as if we never left New York. The restaurants were good, the (duty-free!) shopping was plentiful, and I think half of Long Island decided to join us. In addition to our regularly scheduled drinking and gambling followed by a few recovery sessions on the beach, we went horseback riding and parasailing.
Horseback riding on the beach at sunset was very, very romantic an' shit. I wasn't expecting to still be on the horse at sunset, but I was and it was relaxing. Something about being able to connect with an animal after living in a concrete jungle for so long really put me at ease. My horse was named Geronimo, but I renamed him Spot. I still cheekily yelled, "Geronimo!" whenever he galloped, which I'm sure delighted the rest of the group. I hadn't been horseback riding in over 15 years, so I was pretty excited (but as you can see, I played it totally cool).
Parasailing was nice, but uneventful. You go out, you go up, you look at shit, you go down. I did it. Check.
Oh, you wanted to know about the gambling. We spent a fair amount of time at the craps table at the Stellaris Casino at the Marriott. We stayed at the Radisson for the first few nights we were there, but their casino didn't have as much action. On the upside, its minimums were lower so when there was action, it was pretty fun. We played poker there and I won an insane amount of money. I wasn't sober when I sat down, so I couldn't tell you how.
After cabbing it to Stellaris almost every night, we were pleased when Priceline gave us a room in that hotel for a couple extra nights when we decided to extend our vacation. There was no card room, so we spent the rest of our vacation playing craps and doing nothing.
The rest of my photos from Aruba
The 3M Half Marathon
I ran it! In two hours and 43 seconds! I beat my previous half marathon time by only a few seconds, but this time I got to the starting line before the race began and didn't throw up afterward, so I'll remember it as a huge improvement. I think I was generally more comfortable throughout this year's 3M Half Marathon because I've been training for the full AT&T Marathon, which will be here all too soon. Or maybe it was the nice ladies handing out tissues and Mardi Gras beads. I don't feel 100 percent prepared for the big race, but this is my one chance to run 26.2 miles at 26.2 years of age. What? There are better criteria for choosing when to train for a marathon?
Manhattan Comedy School
Gus and I enrolled in a stand-up class at the Manhattan Comedy School to lift our spirits and meet some new people. Of course, one of the first things I found out is that I need to invite all my friends to my performance at Caroline's in NYC on Saturday, March 3rd. Crap, these people are supposed to be my friends! Well, Jenny's coming out from Wisconsin. Anyone else who's been meaning to visit me in New York, now is the time. But Jenny signed up first, so she wins the couch.
Toronto
What good is a passport if you can't leave the country again and again? This time, we headed north to visit Katitude and play in a Poker Blogger Tournament, a.k.a. (eh-kay-eh) "Eh Vegas". I placed fourth out of eight in the tournament (needless to say, not in the money), but I got to drop the hammer for a winning hand before I busted out, so I was happy.
We also took the bus to Casino Rama, which sounded like an okay idea but turned out to be a not-very-okay idea. We thought the bus would pick us up last and that it would be a two-hour ride. The bus actually picked us up first, so it was a three-hour ride. Someone had mentioned that Toronto has three Chinatowns, and I can confirm this because we went through each of them. We played cards the whole time since the only decent-sized minimum craps table was already full when we arrived.
When we got back, we ate at a wonderful restaurant in the Distillery District called Archeo and played some more cards with the other bloggers.
Of course, I couldn't go to Canada without visiting Niagra Falls, and we couldn't go to Niagra Falls without forgetting our camera. Below is a camera phone picture of me, Smokey the Kat-Burglar... Yes, I am as cold as I look! But even though the weather wasn't great, the icy falls looked gorgeous.
