1. Rode the elevator. When someone from the 14th floor got on, I said, “HAHA! You really live on the 13th floor!” and pretended to cast a spell on her.

2. Saw a toilet by a storefront in Chelsea. It had a sign that read, “No ifs or ands, only butts.” It is the only ashtray I’ve seen that contained human feces.

3. Ran into a bunch of construction workers taking a break on 34th Street. I yelled, “Hey sexy! Gimme some-a dat!” Then I yelled it in Spanish so the other 90 percent of the group could understand.

4. Walked by a restaurant (or something) called “Caviar & Banana.” These probably don’t go together, but I haven’t eaten solid food in awhile so at this point anything sounds good.

5. Entered a book store with a knife and a crazy look in my eyes and asked if they had any books about amputation.

One Comment

  1. Texas Hippie says:

    Thanks, I needed that laugh :)