The people who lived in our apartment before us didn’t have a whole lot on their minds, as evidenced by their lingering subscriptions to People and Us magazines, and a bunch of catalogs full of crap that no one needs (think Fingerhut). A recent issue of People came with a thick “outer cover” containing a large ad for a subscription to Real Simple, a magazine devoted to making life easier. Of course, this ad depicted the cover of a recent issue. The largest teaser on the cover read, “No time to clean? Quick solutions for every room.”
Are you fucking kidding me? Anyone who makes time to read the drivel they write in People has more than enough time to clean. In fact, if you’re geared toward caring about the diets and love lives of people you don’t know personally and who certainly don’t give a damn whether they know you, you not only have enough time to clean your house, you should also come over here and clean mine.