why any coach would ever call this exercise by its proper name to children will always escape me. And all this time I just thought they called them fartlicks because they were a real pain in the ass and those fartlickers that couldn't get to practice on time made us do them for an extra five minutes. Fartlickers.

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How does one actually go about licking a fart? Is it possible? And if it is possible, who figured this out and why? Do they continue to lick farts? Does it aid in causing lung cancer? Do they lick their own farts or others? Is fartlicking a result of brown-nosing? Or does it accompany ass-kissing? Maybe it is another term for carpet licker, but for guys? Great, now I won't sleep tonight trying to figure out the answers to the questions.

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Can I just say what a great boon to my self-esteem Ugly Betty is? I mean, the original Betty la Fea was slightly more convincing in her rocking of "la fea," but the Americanized version apparently embodies ugly via glasses and braces. The horror! Gouge out your eyes lest ye behold the tragic deformities caused by orthodontry and optometry!

Fuck you, ABC.

Hugs,
Joie

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