PlatKat.com: Who Changed Our Club's Name to Buzz-Buzz Buzz-Buzz-Buzz?

Friday, April 15, 2005

Who Changed Our Club's Name to Buzz-Buzz Buzz-Buzz-Buzz?

Last night, I finally got a decent night's sleep. The night before last, as I lay down to go to sleep, I hear a "Buzzzzzzz" in my ear and awake to find one of those big nasty flying things circling my room. When I jumped up, it was chillin' on my bed, so I yanked the covers off all quick-like, which moved the mattress, which caused the box spring to come off the frame. So my bed had pretty much collapsed. Putting together a bed by yourself is hard!

To make things worse, there's some stupid bird who likes to come out squawking at 4am. Larry asked, "Does it go through like 30 different bird calls?" And I said, "If some retarded bird is waking me up before the sun rises, I'm not exactly paying attention to its calls."

But apparently, it's just about mating season for this type of bird, so it mimics the calls of other birds and does it really loud.

Larry's suggestion: "Just throw a rock at it. If you just let him know that the tree by your window isn't cool, he'll move further down the street."

I don't like throwing rocks at things at 4am, so we decided that he'll be throwing the rock. (It woke him up too.)

We had this conversation while playing Scrabble last night. I won, but only because I got some good letters and was able to take advantage of multiple triple word scores.

Of course, every word I spelled had to be some kind of sexual innuendo. I really wasn't trying to get at anything. Those were just words I could make with the letters I got. But after I spelled "sexing", "wife", "nest", and "hentai", things got a little creepy.

I made some joking comment about where my mind is these days. Larry offered to give me a massage. I know he was kidding, but the thought of it made me shudder anyway. He also said something like, "I wouldn't even have to get you drunk." And at that point, I began talking about when my wonderful, intelligent, and totally committed boyfriend is coming to town and all the fun stuff we plan to do together.

And I feel bad. Here I am, just invading this poor guy's space and inadvertently waving everything he can't have right in front of his face. Feeling sorry for people sucks. I'm going to check some stock quotes now.

posted by platkat @ 8:58 AM